Peach'view

Dear Peach’z, 

Since we created this blog, we share our questions and analysis on how social networks have influenced our love relationships and more broadly our relationships in general. So far we have shared the views of four young girls, born with social networks and currently in communication school. Perhaps we lack of objectivity, precisely because we have not experienced life without social networks. That is why today we chose to interview a woman, Florie Bodin, on the subject. We believe that through her experience, she is approaching the issue from a new perspective, perhaps more professional and mature.

Florie is 33 years old. She works on social influence marketing for a communication agency named Travel Insight, but before that she was an independent publisher for 10 years old. Because of her job but also of her lifestyle she is really active on social networks and knows all their strengths and weaknesses. 

Enjoy ! 

Through your age and your experiences, did you observe a change in your way of socializing because of social media ?

I grew up without social media. Facebook exploded while I was in college, Instagram when I started working, stories are only 4 years old: I was already 28 years old. And yet it took a daily place in our lives. I honestly think that we were taking more advantage of the moment and the people who were facing us without the intermediary of a phone. We were also taking more news from people, because today we feel we know how they are doing by following their news on the networks.  And yet I am grateful that in times of crisis these media exist to entertain us and keep us from the place! It also changed a lot of professional behavior (difficult separation between personal and professional), and relationships of course.

 Do you believe that social media are pushing you to take part of a community ?

I have a special look at social networks because it is my job to use them and analyze them on a daily basis, but I would say that yes, we push to qualify personalities in categories and themes. From a personal point of view, social media also pushes us to caricature ourselves, to bring out traits of character or style in order to be identified, seen, validated, liked. By definition, social media is created and we belong to virtual communities, yes.

Did your use of social network transform you in a more narcissistic person ? Can you explain why ?

Face your camera to talk or write, filter our faces and distort our thoughts in a certain way, in order to be validated by others. So I would say yes, social media drives us to be self focused on our appearance and the judgment of others. It is an outbidding of appearance and aesthetics. 

There is also the fear of missing something, of not showing, of not being seen, a phenomenon that has become common and that can put some pressure and push to post on oneself. 

But I also see a lot of things that push us to go towards each other, to create a link, to share, to follow, to be interested, to think, to create. Beyond the narcissistic aspect, I see it as a community space and a tool for creation and social reflection.

As in real life, we can talk to get along or shut up to listen.

Do you think that Tinder has profoundly changed the dating process ? Do you think that it freed us from certain patterns by decomplexing the love encounter or, on the contrary, locked us in another pattern, more unhealthy, a kind of consumerist vision of love ?

I believe it’s both of them. It is both a great accelerator and a way to free people from their needs, desires, identities. LGBTQ people, women of all ages and backgrounds, everyone can be who they want and express it in a certain way. It’s a step forward. 

But our generation, millennials, unfortunately learned to consume everything and then throw away. Generation zapping, disembodied, without consequence, without affect. It’s cold, it’s digital, it’s useful as much as it can be dangerous. But it is up to us to make it a human encounter.

Could you recommend us a film to watch, an insta account to follow, a series to devour and a book to read that deal with relationships, sexuality and social media ?

I love to follow from the beginning the account of « amours solitaires », it is paradoxical because it shows that at the time of 100% digital, we have not lost our desire to write and handle words. The form has evolved but the background is still there. 

During the confinement I watched the Netflix series The Circle which is a beautiful example of what we can be (or pretend to be) behind a screen. Just like the Black Mirror anticipation series, which does not deal specifically with sexuality but human relationships in our digital era.

Do you find that social network pushed to free nudity and self-acceptation but also to trivialize sexuality ?

To be free at all, like all the media. When I was in college, it was through radio and free air shows. Cinema has also played its part, the arts in general. However, on social media, there is an escalation of comments and judgments that can be dangerous and make subjects vulnerable. Free access to sexuality on the internet is not new, today we click we consume it is very banal (while at one time sex remained written on private channels), what can be a problem is the education made around it. Sexual learning should not be done on the internet, it is done in physical interaction, exchange, understanding and listening. 

Sending nudes, showing off naked is just as common as watching Porn Hub, except that you do not control your virtual image as you control your image in the real. Vitality is the great danger of our sexuality 2.0.

Do you have a crispy and funny anecdote to share with us about an experience you had with Tinder or other dating app ?

True anecdote: I have just received a notification when I was answering this questionnaire. It seems that after 2 months of confinement, the application wakes up actively. Funny, I had already observed that the activity peaks were on Sunday afternoon (maybe a spleen effect on the weekend). Starting Tinder is a bit of a break in our routine and opening up the catalogue of the little thrill. For my part, I used it a few times, and I met the games in less than 48 hours. Nothing beats real life, even disappointed, at least fixed ! Long live reality.

We hope you enjoy this interview. We think it has enriched the analysis we build through each of our articles to try to give you a complete and relevant answer to the question: how did social networks influence our relationships ?

See you soon, dear Peach’z ! 

By the whole team